Politics: Donald Trump Release Ravenous “Gollum-Like” Creatures To Hunt Down Illegal Immigrants

Donald Trump is following through with his promise to cut Federal spending, to avoid increased spending on ICE. Donald Trump has recruited the assistance of ravenous “gollum-like” creatures to hunt down illegal immigrants. In a recent press release, Trump stated, “Heading east of Gondor, there’s a great place, a great place, they call Modor. I met a great man, Sauron, they don’t tell you about Sauron, really, really, he nearly conquered all of Middle Earth, they don’t tell you that, they don’t”. When questioned about the ethics of importing thousands of these creatures to hunt down illegal immigrants Trump responded “long enough have the American people had to hide in fear when the mailman comes or when the gardener enters your backyard, I’m bringing thousands of hard working Americans to fix the disgraceful job sleepy Joe did under his administration”. We asked our political correspondent for comment, he said “It’s pathetic, it’s pathetic how Democrats can’t handle any from of reform in our country, first they create this crisis and now they refuse a completely reasonable solution, these creatures have shown amazing results in the field, and democrats just can’t except the hard truth”.